Productive Avoidance

Hey there, what’s cooking good lookin’?

I am currently supposed to be working on a few websites but I am stuck on something for one of them and then I have been avoiding one because I don’t believe what I am working on is going to work- or I don’t believe in it. Which as I am typing that out, that’s stupid asf.

I am editing my website so I can sell prints digitally and I am second-guessing myself because I just never thought about selling my prints digitally before, so the pessimist in me is thinking poorly about the result when I should be looking at it through a more optimistic lens.

There’s so much that I want to do right now and I find myself moving back and forth from task to task- not in a productive way though.

However, each day I am actively working towards something. So let’s celebrate that! Speaking of celebrations, ya boy is officially 29. So far 29 has been really cute. I’m really stoked for this year. I have gained clarity on things that I have been stuck on and I’m moving forward, baby! I realized that over the past three years, I have been wanted to do this big project. But the project has been so “big” that I’ve been telling myself that I can’t work towards it until I am more put together and have more money to put into it.

But recently, I’ve been thinking and FUCK THAT!

I’m sick and tired of putting my dreams and aspirations on hold because stupid ass bills or stupid ass life shit. Life is life and the only way I am going to achieve and of my dreams or goals is if I am actively working towards them. So this year, my last year in my 20s, I am dedicating to just doing everything it is that I have been wanting to do for so long. Without getting in my way. Without overcomplicating things. Simply just act from a state of being and create whatever it is that I am supposed to create.

The deeper I get into my art, the more I find myself getting lost in it. I’ve been astonished by how much I have advanced in my art skills since January- when I started really honing in on my art again. But then again.. maybe the skill was always there and I just never really gave it the time/energy until now.

No more wasting my potential.

As a gift to myself for my last year in my 20s, I am giving myself permission to set myself up for success in my 30s. And going forward I will be looking at my life in decades. So this being nine years into 20, I’m finna go out with a bang.

I have some really exciting things in the works and I can not wait to share them with you.

Thank you for always listening to my silly little rants.

I hope you are putting your magic into good use.

Talk to you soon, love Kyrin.