Learning new skills??

Lmao I just reread the beginning of my last blog post to see where I was at mentally and here I am yet again, feeling a little embarrassed and overwhelmed at the fact that I haven’t been keeping up with this as much.

HOWEVER, I have been creating designs and prints and have come up with a way for me to get my art out there. Within the next few weeks I plan on figuring out which local kava/coffee shops to go to that sell art and see if anyone will sell my art for me.

Putting more focus on digital work has been a breath of fresh air because I have wanted to make living off of art, but the physical copies are more time consuming and I am only able to produce one product, so it has made sense to turn my focus in digital art.

It’s also been fun learning a new skill.

I will admit though, I haven’t been as focused as I would like to be.

Grindr has had my focus lately and I have been hooking up with a lot of dudes.

I went on a date last week and prior to the date, and shortly after the date, the guy proposed that we deleted grindr and took time to get to know one another on a deeper level. Which sounds all fun and dandy, but I have realized that romance is sort of hard for me right now.

Since my last relationship, I have built up a lot of walls. I used to give my heart away so easily and fall in love so easily, but ever since I got my shit rocked, I have sort of had my guard up when it comes to romance and love.

That, but then also he wanted to go on multiple dates and go to these nice places, which is nice and all… but ya boy is financially in NO position to be engaging in that kind of behavior.

Then I got in my head a little bit because I’m 28 years old and I should really be more established..

Not comparing myself to others (even though there are definitely 28 year olds doing better than me), but rather comparing myself to the highest version of myself. In which I haven’t really been performing up to his standards.

I have high hopes for this year, so I have to keep reminding myself to stay focused on my goals and dreams.

I have been learning how to use Procreate, where I have been making my designs and printing them to sell. I also designed a logo for my younger sister’s business. It’s made me want to expand my skills in design.

I keep going back to this quote about luck that Dan Koe mentions in some of his content stating that, “Luck is the percentage that increases with the number of people that know your value. There are two lessons here. One, is that you need to become valuable.”

So I have been figuring out what I can do to make myself more valuable so I can improve my self-worth/self-image and stop serving.

I haven’t gotten in my head about serving with a degree since I have been working on projects on the side. But my sister keeps telling me that I am making myself small by serving.

Not that there is anything wrong against serving, she just knows that I am meant for bigger things and I can’t rely on serving forever. Especially since I have a degree.

Which is the mf truth.

Every day I am one step closer in creating the life that I desire. I’m not entirely sure what that entails but I have a general idea or at least a direction to go in. Which is super exciting.

Dan Koe just released a book this week called The Art of Focus. I had ordered it and read the introduction today. Some things that stood out to me were,

• “There doesn’t seem to be a more worthwhile endeavor to dedicate your life to than to see what you are capable of.”

• “You cannot understand freedom if you do not conquer what made you a slave.”

• “With the advancements in technology, medicine, and decentralization, anybody can build wealth, leverage, and an overwhelming sense of satisfaction in life. All they need to do is learn how to focus in this beautiful black hole of distractions.”

• “Controlling the information that you hold in your focus is the key to overcoming the anxiety, boredom, stress that plague today’s society.”

• “The depth, wholeness, and state of your focus will determine the entirety of your life.”

• “Focus influences the quality, impact, and virality of your work. Focus is the start of all things good. Habits, routines, goals, health, relationships, finances, mood, and sense of purpose. All the things that you know hold power but can’t seem to reap the benefits from.”

Juicy, right?

These were just a few things that stood out to me throughout the introduction, but tomorrow I am diving into chapter one and am so excited to learn and to talk about it in my next post.

It’s past midnight, so I am about to hit the hay, but thank you for taking the time to read this. I appreciate you more than you know.

Love always, Kyrin.